If Your Kid Has Sensory “Issues,” You Need to Hear This.

 Hey friend, welcome to the Connected and Capable Podcast. In this episode, we are going to be talking all about what you need to know if your kid has quote unquote sensory issues, or you yourself do, because it is super common for this to show up in families and for you to start learning about your kid and to see this in yourself.

If you’re an adult and you’re listening for yourself, you are welcome here to, uh, sensory challenges or sensory needs, as I prefer to call them, are not just something that children experience. If you’re new here, my name is Alicia Grogan and I am a pediatric occupational therapist for more than two decades, and I’m also a mom of three.

One of those kiddos has had some significant sensory needs in his life, and I am so happy to share here today with you what I desperately think every parent of a uniquely wired kid needs to know about these sensory challenges. What they really are. Who exactly has sensory issues or sensory needs?

We’re gonna talk about three big specific ones, and I’m gonna get into something that’s a little bit controversial about how to handle sensory needs. This is a really important message, so make sure you stick in here with me today if you’re not really sure what sensory. Issues, and I’m using air quotes there, for those of you that are listening on the podcast, sensory issues show up in all sorts of ways.

If you have a kid that has not been able to sit still while they eat dinner, maybe they’re wiggling all over the place, they dance around the table, they struggle to sit down, or you take them to story time at the library and they can’t, they can’t sit still. Or they are doing really dangerous things like they are jumping off the top of the high dresser or literally trying to hang from the ceiling fan.

These are examples of the sensory system and your child’s sensory processing at work, but you might also see a kid that is refusing to get dressed that does not want to put anything on that is having a meltdown. My son would do this and actually. Even now, uh, the, these older, uh, it shows up in a little bit of a different way and his sensitivities aren’t so strong, but he really struggles in the fall with the transition from shorts to pants.

It’s really hard to get used to feeling those pants on his legs again. That is his sensory system at work. There are a plethora of examples of the way that sensory shows up in our lives, and I’ll be sharing those. As we go throughout this episode, but I wanna make sure that we understand what the sensory needs really are.

Like, why are these happening? It’s a result of our sensory processing. This is a system in our brain and it actually takes place in a bunch of different areas all throughout our brain, and it is working. All of the time, every minute of the day, whether we are waking or whether we are sleeping, it is one of the most powerful and used systems in our brain, and our brain has to constantly, and I do mean constantly sort through the sensations it’s experiencing and decide what it’s going to respond to and how it’s gonna respond to it.

Think about that for a second. Right now, whatever you’re doing, wherever you are, your brain is ignoring a multitude of sensations. It is likely ignoring the way that the chair feels underneath of you. If you are riding in a car right now, your back is getting input from the back of the chair.

Arms and legs have clothing likely on them. If you’re in a northern climate like me, and so your body is not really paying attention, your brain is not paying attention, so your body is not responding to these sensations. There are likely sounds, there are lights, there are smells all happening simultaneously at any given second.

That your brain is deciding what to pay attention to and what not to that sorting through is what sensory processing is, and this comes from actually eight different senses, not just the five that you learned about in kindergarten. Those five are pretty easy to understand. Right. That’s our, that’s our vision.

That’s our hearing, that’s our, our sense of smell, taste, and touch. We can see. Kind of all of these senses, we can see our eyes, we can see our nose, we can see our skin that has all of these touch or tactile receptors that let us know when we are being touched. But there are three senses that we can’t see, but are also working all of the time.

One of them is called proprioception. We have receptors all throughout the joints and muscles throughout our whole body. Help us just know where our body is so that we’re not crashing into stuff all the time. That is a sensory need. If your child is crashing into stuff all the time, it’s because of their proprioceptive system.

Our brain is constantly getting information about where our body is so that we know how to move. We have another hidden sense called the vestibular system. This makes sure that we don’t fall down. It’s our sense of balance and it’s located deep inside of our inner ear. If your kid gets dizzy, if they refuse to get on a swing, if your kid is running around like a wild person, never stop spinning.

Wants to swing all the time. These are all vestibular sensory needs. It’s because of this sense in our inner ear that we can’t see, but is working all of the time. And then lastly, we have the sense of interoception, and that is located all throughout the inside of our body. Because we have sensations from our feelings, our heart may clench.

Our stomach might get upset. Hey, how do you know when you need to use the bathroom? That’s because of your interceptive sense. It’s taking those sensations from inside of our body and deciding what do we pay attention to and what do we ignore? So if you have a kid that feels like they have to go to the bathroom every three seconds, that’s an overactive and interceptive.

And the opposite. If your kid is struggling to know when they have to go to the bathroom, or they feel it at the very last second, their brain is ignoring too many of those signals. Now, to be clear, this is not a choice they’re making with any of these sensory needs. This is how their brain is wired. It’s not a choice, and it is super common for kids that have a diagnosis of A DHD.

That have a diagnosis of autism. There’s even a high correlation with kids that have anxiety, that they have sensory processing that is over reactive or under reactive, and so it’s causing these sensory challenges. Now, please hear me. It’s a separate thing, so it’s not that autism is sensory needs. Or anxiety is sensory needs.

It’s that they’re both coexisting at the same time, and we see common links between these diagnoses. Unfortunately, there is not a official sensory diagnosis. Some of you may have received a diagnosis called sensory processing disorder from an occupational therapist, but it is not in an important manual called the DSM.

Doctors and insurance companies use to give official diagnosis and that will provide care. While there is a large agreement within the professional community, especially among occupational therapists, and truthfully a large portion of doctors that agree that sensory processing disorder, meaning how the child’s brain is wired, can be, it’s, it’s a challenge, its own diagnosis in and of itself.

For a whole lot of reasons we’re not gonna go into in this episode. It is not unfortunately, an official diagnosis. Don’t let that deter you though, because if you see a lot of sensory challenges in your child, if you see that it’s affecting your child’s life, I want you to know that there’s something that you can do about it.

There are powerful ways to support your child. And to help even change the way some of this wiring is connected in their brain to help improve their quality of life. We’ll talk about that in just a minute, but I wanna make sure that we get a little bit more specific and drill down here on three types of sensory needs that we very commonly see in kiddos.

You may have heard of some of these terms before, and these are all types of what’s called sensory modulation. Processing challenges. Okay. I know that’s a lot of big words. Uh, and, and I really try to avoid all of the kind of heavy therapies talk because it gets lost in translation and sensory processing is such a major part truly of every one of our lives.

We all have sensory preferences. We all have ways that our brain processes information and things that we enjoy, things that we don’t enjoy, things that will trigger us. It’s just that for some of us, our window of tolerance or a window of what we need is much higher or much lower, and when that happens, it starts to affect the way that a child or an adult is able to enjoy.

Their life or be able to go through their life in a way that’s meaningful without the constant assault of overreaction or having such a high need for this seeking. So to be clear, as we’re about to talk about these sensory modulation challenges, this is one type and often the type that we’re really focusing on when we’re talking about kids that are uniquely wired.

There are some other types of sensory processing that get into the way kids move related to their motor planning, as well as even their postural control. We’ll save those for another episode in the future, but for today, we’re focusing on this sensory modulation piece, and so there are three big areas that we think about.

The first is sensory seeking, so it’s just what it sounds like. It’s when your kid wants a lot of sensory input. What’s happening in the brain is that these sensations are not really getting processed. Uh, they’re not getting, uh, told that, Hey, this is enough movement. So the brain is like, Hey, I still need more of that, because kids developmentally are wired to move and explore.

And so as kids do this in a typical way, those needs often get met. But for some kids, it’s almost as if those sensations are not fully received. And so the brain thinks that it keeps needing more, it needs more of those sensations, more of that stimulation. And for some of these kids, it almost feels as if no matter how much you give them, it’s not quite enough.

You will see sensory seekers. They are the ones that are climbing the furniture, hanging from the ceiling, fans, spinning in circles. They may also do things like push themselves into the wall, uh, squeeze themselves into tight spaces. They may lick people or things in their environment or smell them. They may love bright lights and put them in front of their face.

They may touch everything and everybody. Those are all examples of sensory seeking. Now to be clear, we talked about those eight senses, how a kid goes about, uh, processing sensations can vary from sense to sense. So sometimes they may be seeking some sensations, other times they may not be registering them at all.

We call this low registration. This is probably the most least common. The one that you may not have heard of before, and this is when the sensations just are not received at all, and as a result we see a very low arousal level. Kids that have low registration usually seem very disconnected. They are usually kind of lethargic and fatigued.

They’re often described as lazy or low energy, and this is just because their brain is not getting the stimulation it needs. And so it’s keeping it in this really low level. It’s like almost like they’re in that state of just waking up in the morning and they don’t ever rise out of it. And then our third.

Of sensory modulation are sensory sensitivities. This is the hyper over reactive response to sensory processing. So when the brain is saying, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that’s too much. That clothing feels too much. That smell is too much. That taste is too much. Those lights are too bright. It’s too loud in here.

I can’t stand that toilet flushing The firetruck just drove down the street. I’m having a meltdown because it sent me into fight or flight because it was so overwhelming to my system. That is because of how the brain is wired. But please hear me. This also. Maybe because your child is already elevated into a state of fight or flight.

This also may be because your child is also dysregulated from their emotions because they’re not, they’re not eating well because they are sick, because they have not slept well. And so all of those things cause our nervous system to be on edge and dysregulated, and so. Your child’s sensory needs are going to fluctuate from day to day, hour to hour, and even minute to minute based on how their brain, their nervous system, is kind of handling all of these different aspects of their environment, of their day.

And so their tolerance of what they can take may fluctuate and it may change because of these different variables. It’s also important to know that retained primitive reflexes can be the cause for this kind of overreactive response or even these kind of seeking or low registration behaviors that we see in kids.

So we talked about that in episode two and how when these reflexes are retained, it interferes with all of development and sensory processing is not an exception to that. So know that that may be causing these sensory needs. It’s not always the case. Sometimes this is because of how they, how your child’s brain is wired.

But what’s really important to know, especially with sensory sensitivities, is that they do have a tendency to become more hypersensitive over time. The reason this is, is that when an individual has sensory sensitivities, it’s extremely overwhelming to the nervous system. The nervous system wants to protect itself.

It’s often going into that fight or flight mode to say, oh my gosh, this was too much. That was way too much. That noise was way too loud. These clothes are making my skin feel like it’s crawling. That taste of food and my mouth makes me wanna throw up. And so the brain wants to protect, protect itself from that happening again.

And so it begins to put up a barrier. And it begins to scan the environment all of the time, looking for a potential threat to their sensory system. This hyper vigilance starts to create more and more sensitivity in a lot of kids over time. The more the brain moves into that fight or flight state, the more reactive it becomes.

So here’s the controversial piece that I want to talk about. There is a huge movement to basically say, Hey, if you have a sensory sensitivity, especially in children, we should completely honor that and do nothing about it, because that sensory sensitivity is the way your brain is wired and there’s, that’s who you are.

In some ways that is awesome and it is where I want to start because when an individual has a sensory sensitivity, it is real. It is intense, it is completely overwhelming, and if we minimize that and say you’re overreacting or that’s a little bit much, or come on, pull it together. We are completely dismissing that experience.

That child or that individual is going to feel isolated, alone. It is not gonna help them to feel understood or, or help them move forward. So to be clear, the first thing that we want to do when we know our child has a sensory sensitivity is to support them, is to minimize it, is to turn off the lights, is to give them the noise canceling headphones.

Is to cover their ears when those noise canceling headphones aren’t around and that toilet flushing goes off and you’re in the IKEA bathroom and you didn’t know it was coming, it’s to pull them in and hold them tight to help calm their nervous system. It’s to find the clothes that feel more comfortable on them or to allow them to run around in their pajamas when they don’t have anywhere to be, because it’s not setting off their sensory system.

All of that is true, however. As I said, these sensory sensitivities can snowball. They also can greatly impact a child’s life when it is becomes a paralyzing effect For them to be able to eat anything or go anywhere, their life can soon become consumed and controlled by these sensory sensitivities. So as an occupational therapist, so much of my work has been in helping to slowly and intentionally with dignity and respect for that child, but to help their brain make new connections, which is possible.

That’s called learning. When a child learns to read, their brain is making new connections. When a child learns to ride a bike, their brain has made a new connection. When a child learns to be able to tolerate a little bit more than they used to be able to tolerate of a texture on their hands, a food in their mouth, a smell, there is a new connection in the brain that is being made.

Now the brain is still gonna defer to that older connection that is strong, that it is used most of the time. But the more that a child uses this new connection, you can actually see sensory sensitivities decrease. Isn’t that amazing? The problem is that I hear some professionals say, we shouldn’t be doing this.

I. Can you see how that’s problematic? What I do love is that when I see this on social media, even from people that are in a therapeutic position like myself, I also see a large host of comments underneath from adults who are saying, I am so grateful. I had somebody help me with my sensory sensitivities, or I would not be able to function today with how intense my sensory sensitivities were.

So if your child has a sensory sensitivity, it’s important to know to hold both of these things hand in hand. Always supporting first and then taking clear, intentional steps to help break down those sensitivities for our sensory seekers. We need to give them an outlet to move. And sometimes that involves doing it in a really specific way.

Some sensory seekers just need the movement and however they get it, they will start to calm and regulate once they do. Unfortunately, there are a lot of kids that just don’t have an opportunity to move the way they need to. This is a huge problem in our school systems as we expect them to sit so much in recesses, get cut back more and more.

Just giving them that movement is huge and can be the game changer that they need. Some have such a high threshold that it just excites and winds them up even more. And for those kids, we need to be intentional about how we use movement. We need to give it purpose and direction. Instead of just running around outside, we do a relay.

Where we tag off and they, they hit your hand and they run back and forth between a spot as hard as they can, and then you do, or their sibling does, or a friend does. This purposeful and directed movement can make all the difference. There are a host of other strategies for those things too, like using rhythmic movements, timed movements, clapping, singing a song.

These things hack into different areas of the brain. Help the brain calm down, even for the biggest sensory seeker and our low registration kiddos. Well, they need intense input. We need to really make sure that those sensory receptors are getting stimulated enough for the brain to register them, so we need quick, intense input.

As kids participate in these activities, they not only are starting to rewire their brain and their brain is learning to process these sensations in more productive ways, but they are also learning how to self-regulate. They are learning what their body needs to be able to calm down. Know that many of us self-regulate through sensory activities all of the time.

If you are an adult that has to do their morning workout or they feel off all day, you are giving yourself a ton of sensory input if you need to wind down with yoga when you’re finished with work or after the kids go to bed. Whoa, way more sensory input there again. If you stick a piece of gum in your mouth to help you stay alert when you’re struggling to pay attention at work, or you’re tired and you’re on a drive, or you put the window down for that cool air to be on your face, you’re self-regulating with sensory strategies.

Sensory processing is a massive part of our life when you understand it. It opens up the door to you supporting and helping your child in powerful new ways. The secret hidden thing that starts to happen is that you end up building a lot of connection with your child. ’cause your child is not able to say, Hey mom, I have, I have some vestibular processing needs.

They show it. They show it in different ways. And when they see that you’re helping to support those needs and that you’re getting it, they start to see you and connect with you in a brand new way. And that is the secret, special, awesome magic that happens when we just even start to see that this is what our kids are going through.

And you will probably start to notice it a bit in yourself too. Now if you’re listening and you’re like, ah, what can I do next? We have some awesome free resources in the show notes. Uh, you can check those out. We have a sensory printable with sensory activities, some sensory red flags for you to check out.

If you wanna go deeper, you already have that free printable from us. We have the connection high with a host of quick regulating sensory activities, sensory activities that are designed to help build these new connections in the brain. We have a quick sensory crash course, lots of resources there for you and for our therapist.

We have our Rise with Sensory program, that’s A OTA certified, so we’ll have that linked up in the show notes too. If you have specific questions about your kiddo’s sensory needs, we would love to hear them. Hit reply to one of our emails. Uh, let us know what you want to hear about. We are here for it as we are kicking off and getting this connected and capable.

Podcast. Rolling. This is such an important topic, and as an occupational therapist and in the history of your kids’ table over the last 14 years, sensory has been a major emphasis. It has been a compass in my own career. It is a lens that I see every child through, and it has been incredible in my own home as a mom to use sensory activities and to watch my son regulate.

It has been a absolute privilege, and I’m not sure that there’s a more powerful moment for me that when I’m working with a dysregulated kid. That is struggling and we give them the sensory input that they need and I watch them relax, smile, start to talk, make eye contact. ’cause they’re getting regulated through the power of sensory.

It’s pretty incredible. All right, friends, that’s it for this episode. I’ll see you again next time. We’re gonna be getting into executive functioning. All of this executive functioning builds on each other. We’re gonna be specifically diving into emotional regulation, which is one aspect of executive functioning because it’s such a big topic in itself.

So you can see how this, these sensory processing challenges can bleed into our emotional regulation and just how you can start to help building those emotional regulation skills in your own child. It’s been so good to be with you. I’ll see you next time.